The Chubby Keruru Wins Bird Of The Year

No, it’s not a fat pigeon, it’s a keruru. And you’d better recognize, because the keruru has been named as New Zealand’s 2018 Bird of the Year.

Keruru are known for eating rotted and fermented fruit, which induces a delirious state similar to a human getting tipsy. Keruru have been spotted getting so drunk that they fall right out of their treetop perches.

So basically, it’s a chubby pigeon that gets drunk and bumbles around like an idiot until it walks off a branch or into a wall. Yeah, there’s basically no way that wouldn’t completely conquer a crowd.

And conquer it did; out of 48,000 voters drawn to the Bird of the Year event, the Keruru swept the competition with 5,833 of the votes. Congratulations, keruru. Now go home, you’re drunk.