Presidential candidate Donald Trump will host Saturday Night Live on Nov. 7 — but this won’t be the Donald’s first rodeo in Studio 8H. He previously hosted the show back in 2004, during peak fervor for his own NBC reality show, The Apprentice.
In fact, apart from a constant stream of Apprentice references, Trump’s last SNL appearance is probably a good gage of what he’ll bring to the show in Season 41. (The full episode isn’t available online, but we’ve pieced it together using clips and transcripts.) Expect more targeted mockery of his opponents laced with the same signature Trump-brand swagger — the cocksure conviction that he’s invincible, and that his very presence is a gift.
Once, just once, it wavered. “I can’t win,” he said to the camera in 2004, when an aside during the monologue didn’t quite land.
On that, present-day Trump may disagree.
The Cold Open
Trump sets up the episode in a predictable but enjoyable sketch about firing one of three castmates, Apprentice-style. Jimmy Fallon, Amy Poehler and Finesse Mitchell state their defenses and bicker amongst themselves, just like contestants on Trump’s reality series. After Donald fires Jimmy, Lorne Michaels weighs in — and seconds the decision. Man, he must be kicking himself these days.
The Monologue
NBC scored a freebie here; on Nov. 7, the network can recycle a lot of Trump’s 2004 monologue if it wants to.
“It’s great to be here at Saturday Night Live,” Trump begins. “But I’ll be completely honest: It’s even better for Saturday Night Live that I’m here. Nobody’s bigger than me, nobody’s better than me, I’m a ratings machine.”
With his eyes laser-focused on the cue cards and an aggressively monotonous delivery, Trump isn’t a born performer. Still, he manages to score laughs — touching upon his Apprentice salary, noting that after just one season it qualified him as the highest-paid television personality in America, offering a peek into his political philosophy.
“And, as everyone in this room knows, highest-paid means best, right?” Trump asks.
Fathers and Sons
In the only sketch that requires him to do any real “acting,” Trump plays Seth Meyers’ apathetic father as the two of them appear on the local access show Fathers and Sons. They attempt to work through their issues alongside the loving father-son pair of Horatio Sans and Jimmy Fallon. Predictably, Fallon breaks, a highlight that sets everyone tittering — except for Trump.
Boardroom Band Practice
In yet another Apprentice spoof, Trump and his boardroom colleagues, played by Fred Armisen and Amy Poehler, take a break from hiring and firing to practice with their band. It’s the most you’ll see Trump loosen up on the show — he even sings a few lines when he’s not barking orders at his bandmates.
Live with Regis and Kelly: Donald Trump
The best part of this sketch by far is Darrell Hammond, who manages to completely disappear into a perfect impression of Regis Philbin. (It even makes us forget how well he impersonates Trump.) But it’s Poehler who gets both men to break by playing a hyperactive and gooey Kelly Ripa.
The Prince and the Pauper
Trump plays the prince and Hammond plays the pauper in this sketch, where the two decide to switch identities. The charade is supposed to last for a month, but gets shortened when the pauper, in disguise, orders his assistant to kill the prince.
Donald Trump’s House of Wings
Though it’s allegedly href=”http://www.salon.com/2015/08/17/a_rare_snl_sketch_featuring_donald_trump_has_reportedly_been_scrubbed_from_the_internet/”>no longer in the official SNL archives, this sketch details Trump’s fictitious chicken wing venture, and — most importantly — features him dancing in a yellow suit next to cast members in chicken costumes. Fingers crossed for a retread in November.
