Unless a person is in an open relationship, engaging sexually with someone who isn’t a significant other is normally considered cheating. And for the most part, the general consensus is that cheating is wrong.
There is no black and white way of cheating. Cheating can take different forms and can impact all parties involved. The reasons behind a person’s motive to cheat or what actually constitutes cheating in a relationship and whether or not the relationship can ever be the same again is complex. Being cheated on can feel awful; it’s a blow to a person’s trust, self-esteem and ego.
People cheat for a variety of reasons. One of the main reasons, however, is the compulsion to feel good at any given moment regardless of relationship status. These are people who are focused on instant gratification; they feel entitled to sex in any way they can get it. As a result, the person will always rationalize cheating, and continue to cheat.
There’s also the concept of emotional cheating, but most people who are emotionally cheating don’t realize they are doing so. An emotional affair is generally defined as a relationship between a person and someone other than their significant other in which they foster an emotional intimacy. Physical intimacy may not have occurred, but the significant other is turning to another person they find attractive to vent about their feelings or hang out.
Because cheating is so complex and it affects people differently, Refinery29 spoke with three people about the concept of cheating and what happened to them when cheating became a part of their lives.
